And Did I Mention, I Mean, Myntion…

    A quarter century into the new millennium…what could go wrong! Well, if you have the time, read on. 

    The team behind the Scripps National Spelling Bee whacked a hornet’s nest not long ago when it identified specific words for potential competitors to ponder. Its list of “50 challenging third grade words” includes giraffe, groceries, and jigsaw. So far, so good. Not the easiest words for 9- and 10-year-olds. Hell, I’ve seen adults screw up those words! But beneath the “preferred spelling” of women, a permitted option appears: “womyn.” Naturally, this feminist twist on “women” avoids the reference to those pesky purveyors of patriarchy: MEN! And what better place than the third grade to pound the radical woke/feminist drums! C’mon, ladies…Really? 

    “All of the words used in the Scripps National Spelling Bee program are pulled from our official dictionary, Merriam-Webster Unabridged Dictionary,” crowed a spokesperson to various news outlets. “During competition, our policy is to accept any correct spelling listed in our official dictionary that isn’t marked archaic or obsolete. The alternate spelling ‘womyn’ is therefore included on our study list because it is listed as an alternate spelling for ‘women’ in Merriam-Webster.” Moron. Those who made this decision might consider it a triumph for women’s rights, girl power, what have you. But, at best, this low-grade, anti-intellectual, woke symbolism signifies nothing, except, perhaps, the inability to think. 

    One would hope that, at the very least, the people behind the absurdity of changing the spelling of words that have the letters ‘m’, ‘e’, and ‘n’ in consecutive order, might think about the following: Every year, tens of thousands of youngsters, many of them young women and girls, are trafficked into the United States. They are put to work as hired hands, forced into marriages, and worst of all, put to work as sex slaves. The numbers vary. But if it’s only a few thousand per year, or tens of thousands of year...that’s not really the point, is it? The fact is, it happens every day in America, and the numbers are increasing every year. The above atrocities are not just run by pimps, either. They are run by gangs and so-called families, as well. And just to be clear; not all of these poor kids are brought into the United States, legally or illegally; many were born and raised here. Feel free to click on the following link, if your stomach can take it. There are many more links associated with that page. 

    Nonetheless, this type of slavery is alive and well in the United States today and somehow remains a boutique concern rather than a 12-alarm national emergency. One would hope that the change of management in Washington, D.C., gives this carnage the urgent attention that it demands.

    Meanwhile, back in the land of “Men Suck”, the Scripps National Spelling Bee people, and their ilk, do little to battle this human rights catastrophe, or at the very least, shed a light on it. Anything of substance—a searing documentary (documyntary?), an educational seminar, or a protest at the offices of Homeland Security—would help. Instead, the Left signals its virtue by encouraging children to misspell a word that billions of women accept around the globe. I mean, is there anything more vacuous, especially compared to the desperation that these brutalized young girls confront every morning? 

    Meanwhile, if the letters “m-e-n” in “women” makes the radical feminists so nervous, why not change these words, too? 

— Mention to myntion.

— Menial to mynial.

— Mennonites to Mynnonites.

— Mentor to myntor.

— Menthol to mynthol.

 

    Yes, dear reader…that list is as stupid as it looks. The Scripps National Spelling Bee has also suggested that third graders contemplate the word “mansion.” How sexist, right?! Effective immediately, a mynsion is where a wealthy household lives. And remember that 1980s boy band, Menudo? Its members were young, male Puerto Ricans—not least Marc Anthony and Ricky Martin, who achieved even greater glory as solo artists. Radical feminists surely would not want to make Menudo’s female fans uncomfortable. So, don’t be surprised if they insist on calling the band Mynudo. 

    All of this should be diagnosed as myntal illness. I really hate stupid...

 

Write to Peter: magtour@icloud.com